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I’m fine, really…and other lies people tell themselves.

I'm fine

My mom was never a wiz with electronics. She could run a farm business, fix a sewing machine, drive a tractor, and cook a delicious meal for seven, but ask her to use the remote or email an attachment and she was lost.

My mother now runs a thriving business selling handmade children’s clothing. She can hardly keep up with her orders. Did I mention it’s an online business? Mom taught herself everything she needed to know to make it happen. Part of me is shocked and part of me isn’t a bit surprised. When I visit my parents, one of my favourite things to see is Mom curled up with her laptop in sweats and Crocks, glasses perched on the tip of her nose as she checks her orders headed for Japan and Australia. It’s pretty damn cool.

My mom could have decided that she couldn’t run an online business because she didn’t know computers.

What excuses are you making for not going after what you want? And do they really have to stop you?

If you’ve really invested in your excuses, and their hold on you feels too strong, you may have let them break you down to the point of resignation. I obviously can’t have what I want because I’m too ____________ and I’m not __________ enough, so I’m just going to settle for this. I’m okay with it. I’m fine, really.


If that were true, you probably wouldn’t be reading this.

Maybe you’ve resigned yourself to doing work you hate, but it looks good on the outside. Maybe you have an enviable gig with prestige, pay, and benefits, but you ask yourself, Why am I so unhappy? You tell yourself that you should be happy, and in doing so you not only feel miserable, but also guilty for feeling that way. So you suck it up. You’re fine.

There is no honour in sucking it up – in resigning yourself to something less than you deserve. tweet it

If you’ve resigned yourself to settling for something you don’t want, you are not fine. You’re discouraged. You’ve lost hope. And that’s not fine.

The worst type of spin is spin you try to sell yourself – the stories you weave, trying to convince yourself of one thing or another. It makes you both the spider and the fly. You’re only hurting yourself.

Sometimes you just have to admit that is sucks and it’s not okay. If it does suck and it’s not okay, admit it. That’s tough to do if you’ve been spinning yourself a lie for a long time.

Admit the truth.

Notice how it makes you feel.

Do something about it.


This is an excerpt from Careergasm: A Course for Discovering Your Calling.


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